Cell Phone Vs. Smoking

It comes as no surprise to me that a claim has been made that cell phones are more dangerous than smoking.

Why isn't this a surprise to me? Well, because I have half of a brain and can figure these things out.

You may recall the witch hunt of cigarette smoking. Cigarettes were evil, the people that make them are evil, the people that smoke them are evil, and the ones that smoke them causes all of the non-smokers to pay a gazillion dollars in health care benefits because of the burden passed on by these heartless bastards that smoke. Smokers were literally draining the life blood and life savings of the innocents. Not only that, but they were causing the innocents to get sick from their vile and disgusting second hand smoke.

Laws were passed to stop smoking in public places, some even passed laws that kept people from smoking in their own homes, and tobacco companies were sued left and right with gazillion dollar payouts to the "victims" of smoking.

The media crowed this victory over smoking and predicted that cancer rates and medical insurance rates would surely plummet and everyone will be healthy and happy once again! We won the war of smoking and cancer.

Um, wait a minute. People are still getting cancers, and people are still draining the health care industry, and ... well, we need to blame someone. We can't just have a disease that randomly hits people and makes them sick or makes them die! We can't have something we can't fight, cure, or figure out what is really causing it. We can't go on in this life thinking that even if we eat our vegetables, exercise, get enough sleep, we could still contract a horrible wasting disease with no cure!

WAIT! Cell phones! Yes, it must be that since people are stillg etting sick and cancers that it must be cell phones. I mean how else would small kids and people who never smoked could get cancer. We blamed it on those foul second hand smoke emitters, but now that we can eat in a McDonalds without noxious fumes blowing in our faces (and remember, you officially could get cancer from second hand smoke, but you can't get high from second hand marijuana smoke, go figure that one out), the only rational and cost effective reason would be cell phones.

Just about everyone has a cell phone, everyone uses them, and the cell phone industry has a lot of cash. BRILLIANT! Lets blame something that we'll eventually find out is either a huge concoction of environmental factors, or just the luck of the gene draw on something else lucrative to lawyers.


Watch out everyone! Take it from a closet smoker, the time will come where you won't be able to use your cell phone any more, won't be able to have one actually. They'll start whittling away your rights and perhaps you'll be forced to only use your cell phone outside. Soon you won't be able to use it in a food place, or in public even. Those death rays from your cell phone could irradiate the small child in your car, so don't use your cell in the car when children are present. Sound familiar? Yep, it is, but for those of you that can't remember last month, let alone last year, or five years ago will not recognize the fear mongering that is used to get money, and create a bunch of scared lemmings that just swallow every word the media or government throws at you.