Saturday, December 08, 2007

Nothing Ever Works Right


The other night hubby and I were watching the show Life which is a really great show, great writing, great characters, and the plot is all twisty and you can’t figure it out 15 minutes into the show. Therefore, it will be cancelled really soon. Most good shows are. If they don’t explain every little detail to the stupid viewers, or makes you think... they’re doomed for cancellation.

Anyhoo, we hadn’t seen the episode before this season finale one, so we started watching that one on our Tivo (love the Tivo), to catch up, then we would watch the season finale right after that. We never watch anything “live” anymore so we can fast forward through the annoying commercials.

Ok, so we’re caught up and started watching the current episode... except the Tivo locked up. GASP! Our beloved Tivo had an aneurism and was locked up... with 10 minutes left in the current show!!!! OH MY GAWD!!!! After it rebooted, we started watching the show, and sure enough, the pivotal end of the show didn’t record. The last 10 minutes that wrapped up what was going on... not recorded. You’ve got to be freakin kidding me!

This, in general, is the story of our life. We’ve embraced technology to the point where it even answers our phones and directs telemarketers to a confusing mass of buttons to press until they give up, or sends them to a rude message telling them to put us on their “do not call list” as we’ve recorded their phone number and business name and will report them to the FCC thanks to a cool program called Phlink.

We have computers up the ying with various and sundry back up devices, UPS, and other gadgets, and invariably... something vital dies despite our attempts to back up, save, and redundant ourselves to death. No matter how we try to make sure that things continue to work, and if even they don’t we have some kind of back-up, we are thwarted in some technological way.

The Tivo is one example. We have two Tivos actually. One upstairs and one downstairs. The one downstairs is a specially configured Tivo with a gazillion hours of record time and it records two channels at once. Do you think that it would record Life for us and catch the last 10 minutes? Of course not. We hadn’t told it to, but it knows what we like to watch. Instead of recording Life, it was recording some Lifetime movie of the week about some woman that was wronged in some sort of way and she seeks revenge by killing a man. Isn’t that all Lifetime movies? They need to change that channel to “Women who hate men” channel. It also recorded something else stupid, but not Life.

Fine, this is the 21st century, lets just go up and watch it online. NBC does have a halfway decent interface that allows you to watch their shows online (which is the whole bone of contention with the current writer’s strike), but of course... 10 minutes after the show aired, it wasn’t up yet. Ok, that’s stupid, but fine, I’ll wait until tomorrow to find out what happens.

Tomorrow comes and sure enough, the episode is now available on the NBC site. SWEEET! I click on the episode, and then on the chapter, because I don’t need to watch the whole thing, just the last 10 minutes. I’m graced with a notice that says that I’ll be able to watch the show with limited commercial interruption. Spiffy, that’s just what I want. I’m then treated to the annoying Zales commercial that has that REALLY annoying piano song on it by Vanessa Carlton a song truly that will make you want to poke your eardrums out after you’ve heard it a zillion times on commercials this fine festive holiday season as Zales tries to convince you that your loved one will hate your guts unless you get her some really expensive diamonds.

Ok, I suffer through the commercial and sit anxiously waiting for the episode. Firefox dies. SONOFA... I reload Firefox and go back to the site, pick the episode, pick the last 10 minutes and yes... fucking Zales commercial again. Sigh. Fine, sit through it again and the episode starts... and stops for no reason. GAWD DAMN IT! I sit impatiently waiting for it to start again, it doesn’t, and no amount of clicking gets it to start, so back around to the start again, and the dreaded I want to kill someone by now Zales commercial. I’m convinced that they put these glitches in there so by the time you get to see the episode, your ready to go out and shop for diamonds for complete strangers.

I FINALLY get the last 10 minutes to play and after all of that anger and frustration of trying to get it to play, the whole end of the episode was diminished somewhat. I hate Vanessa Carlton for selling out to Zales, I never want to see a diamond in this house and I chain smoked half a pack of cigs in frustration.

Speaking of commercials, why is Johnson & Johnson sucking up to nurses? That song on that commercial is truly annoying as well, as are most commercials songs, but I was just wondering why they blow all that money to tell nurses that they are wonderful. What’s in it for the company, I wonder.

Next up: my experiences with quitting smoking using Chantix. Hubby quit about two months ago using and didn’t experience hardly any of the cool side effects (vivid dreams, homicidal tendencies) so I’ll be ranting about the fun of nausea and giving up smokes.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

The technology around here is mostly ok, it's the rest of the house that rebels. If I fix the toilet, the sink starts leaking. If I fix the sink, the front doorknob falls off. If I fix the front door, the garage door breaks. It makes me want to invest in some kerosene and a box of matches.